College Apps Essay Results - Fall 2015
In Fall 2015, DE102 students' performance in College Apps Essay #1 was analyzed, with trends and breakdowns documented. Feedback highlighted areas for improvement, such as justifying acceptance and effective thesis statements. Students expressed varied feelings about the process, reflecting on challenges and successes. Suggestions were made for enhancing future essay preparation, emphasizing clear thesis statements and effective brainstorming sessions. Examining student work revealed insights into strengths and areas needing development.
Download Presentation
Please find below an Image/Link to download the presentation.
The content on the website is provided AS IS for your information and personal use only. It may not be sold, licensed, or shared on other websites without obtaining consent from the author.If you encounter any issues during the download, it is possible that the publisher has removed the file from their server.
You are allowed to download the files provided on this website for personal or commercial use, subject to the condition that they are used lawfully. All files are the property of their respective owners.
The content on the website is provided AS IS for your information and personal use only. It may not be sold, licensed, or shared on other websites without obtaining consent from the author.
E N D
Presentation Transcript
College Apps Essay #1 Results DE102 Periods 1 and 4 Fall 2015
How are you feeling about the CAEU? a) Pretty good. I m happy with my scores but am still trying to improve. b) Okay. I have writer s block and I m struggling to get the ideas in my head on paper. c) Meh. This is stupid. I m not even going to college. Why are we even doing this? d) Don t make eye contact with me. It s so early I can t even remember if I brushed my teeth.
A B 88 87 85 85 85 85 85 80 80 80 80 C 79 79 77 75 75 75 75 73 72 70 D F 40 32 32 30 0 0 0 100 100 100 100 92 90 90 90 90 90
By the numbers 38 students 5 hours of grading time 1 hour of grade analysis 1 student utilized conferencing in order to plan said student scored above average
Grade breakdown: 10 A s (26%) 11 B s (29%) 10 C s (26%) 7 D s/F s (18%) 55% Above average
Oops Many students spent less than two sentences justifying their acceptance. Ditch dawn of time statements. Definitions hooks were not effective
My bad Next year, I will teach the lesson on thesis first. Were brainstorming sessions clear? Helpful? Feedback here on how to prepare?
Thesis Statements As with any type of performance, three things that revolutionize musical talent are patience, dedication, and confidence. Bryana A strange trend began to occur in sixth grade: screens were everywhere. Even traditional pen and paper tests were replaced with keyboards and plasma screens. Roxy The only differences between heroes and villains is public opinion and the way each justifies their actions. -Hudson
Thesis Statements When people ask about this experience, I explain it simply: I grew up that day. Karlee As I approached the stoplight, it turned yellow and I was forced to face a decision that required judgment, experience, and knowledge. Danielle
Thesis-like closing Statements As I glided across the water I felt weightless. I was free. I had achieved an accomplishment by suppressing the desire to give up. The experience was so beautiful and special that it was worth the efforts. Jordan I ve come to understand that silence isn t always a sign of respect and body language is an important part of conversation. Ericka My downhill adventure on the boar ramp became my journey in life. I had decisions to make, and behind every decision was a mistake waiting to happen. -Lindsey
Thesis-like closing Statements I learned that communication can prevent obstacles and sometimes you can overcome obstacles by looking at the big picture of a conversation. Marcus I realized I was no longer thinking like a child. Shelby My name is like an acronym for who I am. -Todd
Successful use of humor I didn t understand childbirth. For all I knew, my little sister would arrive in the mailbox . Michayla [name] was the top of his class. He was famous for beating a fifth grader in the mile run on field day. I had to have him. Jessica When I was three years old, I was in love with Buzz Lightyear and I was convinced I was going to marry him someday. Ariel
Great hooks Waldo doesn t exist: he s just an idea. Coral Things happen. Harm peeks into everyone s life. Lance We choose our enemies. Abby
Consider this approach Include a thesis in the upper third of your paper. Have a thesis-like statement in your conclusion. Build up your take-away , acceptance, or ethos pitch.
Based on these results How has your understanding of college application essays evolved since we started the unit? What are you planning to do differently for Essay 3? What will you continue to do for Essay 3?
Most importantly There s sugar.
During this podcast: Write informal notes that will help you write a thesis statement later. Your thesis will not summarize the story, it will analyze it. As you listen, you ll need to form your own opinion or takeaway about the podcast.
demonstrated interest avoid clich stories, especially if they have clich morals
