Communication and Conflict Resolution Behaviors for Healthy Relationships

Grace Bible Church Glorifying God by Making Disciples of Jesus Christ

A reminder to consider others Please: Silence your cell phone & all electronic devices Use the nursery or cry room if your child is fussy Get up during the preaching only if absolutely necessary (please sit in back if you must leave early) Refrain from eating & drinking during worship service (except medical needs)

Communication 7 Conflict D Behaviors Good communication skills are necessary for a good marriage and both require humility & being unselfish

High Concern for Relationship Low Value Issue Yield Resolve High Value Issue Compromise Withdraw Low Concern for Relationship Win

Communication 7 Conflict D Behaviors What you value will determine how you respond to a conflict Sin is the root cause of all conflict & the foolishness it brings to life - and pride aggravates them

Communication 7 Conflict D Behaviors Humility is the solution to pride and salvation by faith in Jesus Christ is the solution to sin Gaining knowledge of the truth & wise counsel are the solutions to ignorance, naivete & foolish counsel

Communication 7 Conflict D Behaviors The solution to character issues begins with conversion to become a new creation in Christ (2 Cor. 5:17) Behavioral issues reveal the heart (Mark 7:21-13), so the heart must be changed & not just the behavior

Communication 7 Conflict D Behaviors Humility, being unselfish and considering others as more important (Phil. 2:3-4) are foundational qualities Keep your focus on pleasing God & fulfilling the role He has given you when in conflict with others

Neglect and Indifference Ignorance and wrong example / teaching can result in neglect while thinking you are doing what is right A husband s role includes leading his wife in holiness & diligence in teaching children, not just providing

Neglect and Indifference Wives, do not let personal desires & children usurp your role to follow, respect & love your husband Husbands & wives need to show interest in each other & each others interests, and be encouragers

Neglect and Indifference Neglect due to selfishness & its related sins can become indifference of laziness, uncaring, or cold-hearted Laziness can be resolved by motivation and application of wisdom

Neglect and Indifference Being uncaring or cold-hearted are serious sins that reflect a depraved mind - repentance is needed Find positive ways to encourage your spouse to learn their God given role - do not become like them

Unfair - lack of fairness Much of what people proclaim to be unfair is simply jealousy on their own part To be fair is to be content, - just & honest; impartial; unprejudiced, according to the rules.

Unfair - lack of fairness Fairness can only be applied to the process, not the outcomes. The latter would be blatantly unfair Outcome depends on variables of family background, natural abilities, acquired skills & character qualities

Unfair - lack of fairness Character is the most important factor in determining outcome - Proverbs 10:4, 11:27, 13:4, 21:5 First, life does not give everyone equal family backgrounds, natural abilities or acquired skills

Unfair - lack of fairness God has not give you the same roles in marriage - or in the specifics of life A godly marriage is not a contract or partnership - it is a covenant promise to fulfill your God given role

Unfair - lack of fairness Fairness is a matter of godliness, not equality. It is love, self-sacrifice & faithfulness to the promises made It is not unfair if it turns out to be for worse, poorer & sickness instead of better, richer & health

Unfairness lack of fairness Biblical fairness is equity = upright, strait, on the level, fair, the quality of being fair & impartial (DEI of uses equity with an opposite meaning of equal outcomes which is inherently partial and unfair)

Unfairness lack of fairness Unfairness is harmful because it sides with wickedness, selfishness and self- righteousness The unfair are full of folly & shame making quick judgments and false accusations (Prov. 18:13; John 7:24)

Unfairness lack of fairness Life is not fair nor can it be fair as long as there is sin. Grow up, get over it and move on Be glad that God is longsuffering, merciful, gracious & forgiving instead of fair or you would be in Hell

Indiscrete Discretion is an aspect of wisdom that gives careful consideration & plans before making decisions & acting The indiscrete act on whims, are carried away by the moment, do not consider the possible consequences

Indiscrete A woman who would be considered beautiful is made ugly by indiscretion (Proverbs 11:22) Beware, the fashion industry flaunts indiscretion which should be repulsive to the godly

Shameful Indiscretion easily slides down into being shameful - exposure of what is inappropriate, disgraceful, sinful American society has lost its sense of shame in flaunting blatant sin without remorse - but God judges

Shameful Proverbs 12:4 is a contrast in the issue of character & trust which will bring either honor or dishonor Shame can arise from any sin that becomes known by others, and it affects those who are related

Shameful God determines what is shameful - any refusal to live within His design - but society can sear the conscience Feminism demands equality including women as pastors - but that shames every man present

Shameful Women may not feel ashamed of their fashion - but immodesty shames her, her husband, her father, etc.

Unfaithful Unfaithfulness is the culmination of what was in the heart long before - it is a rejection of the promises made Unfaithfulness in marriage usually destroys it - it takes a lot of forgiveness, patience & tenacity to overcome

Unfaithful It is a small step from turning away from God to a seared conscience that refuses to recognize sin Recognize that fornication & adultery are serious sins of unfaithfulness to a future or present spouse

Unfaithful Walk in wisdom to avoid it (Prov. 5:8), flee if the temptation arises (2 Tim. 2:22), repent if you have fallen Recognize it as serious sin, seek the forgiveness of the Lord, your spouse, family, friends & partner in sin

Conclusions Good communication is twisted, lead astray & shut down by sinful characteristics and behaviors The solution to all sinful beliefs, attitudes & behaviors beings with becoming a new creation in Christ Jesus

Conclusions Christians are be humble, introspective, turn from any sin, and be godly, prayerful, patient & forgiving of others

Grace Bible Church Glorifying God by Making Disciples of Jesus Christ