Handling Pressure in Intimate Situations
Explore effective responses to common pressure lines in intimate situations to empower oneself to communicate boundaries and make informed decisions. Recognize the importance of mutual respect and understanding in relationships.
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Presentation Transcript
You and your partner have been dating for three months and your parents finally let you go over to your partner s house. Their parents are gone and you start making out. One thing leads to another and you end up in bed together--how do you tell your partner it s gone far enough?
Pressure Lines: How to Respond Pressure Line: If you care about me, you ll do it. Response: If you care about me, you ll respect my feelings and not push me into something I m not ready for. Pressure Line: If you don t do what I want, I don t want to see you anymore. Response: If that s the way you feel, I m not sure I want to see you anymore either. Pressure Line: You re my girlfriend/boyfriend. It s OK. Response: That still doesn t make sex OK for me. Being BF/GF won t prevent pregnancy or stop an STI.
Pressure Lines: How to Respond Pressure Line: We did it before, why not now? Response: It s my body and I have a right to change my mind and not do that anymore. I don t have to keep doing it. Pressure Line: What are you afraid of? Response: HPV, Herpes, Chlamydia and about 20 other STIs! Pressure Line: Don t worry, you/I won t get pregnant or catch an STI. Response: How do you know? It can happen to anyone.
Pressure Lines: How to Respond Pressure Line: But everyone is doing it. Response: No, they really aren t. And even if they were, I m not everyone and I know what s right for me. Pressure Line: If I don t relieve this tension, I ll be in pain. Response: No you won t, that s a myth. Besides, if we do it, we might both be in pain if we get pregnant. Pressure Line: What s wrong with you? Response: Nothing. There s absolutely nothing wrong with choosing to wait.
Pressure Lines: How to Respond Pressure Line: We don t have to go all the way. I ll stop when you say so. Response: Let s stop now. Pressure Line: I just want to show my love. Response: Let s think of other ways. Pressure Line: I ve got protection, nothing bad can happen. Response: You mean abstinence? Because that s the protection I m using.
Pressure Lines: How to Respond Pressure Line: But I have a condom. Response: And you ll continue to have it for a long time. Pressure Line: I ll love you forever. Response: I want you to love me for more than just sex. If you love me, you ll respect my decision. Pressure Line: I know you want to. Response: You obviously don t know me too well because, NO, I don t!
Skills to help you succeed in waiting: 1. Choose friends who respect you and your decisions. 2. Hang out in healthy places and have a plan. Staying with a group also helps! 3. Remember you can always just say NO. You can use the responses to pressure lines or offer another activity but if you can t think of anything, NO is perfectly acceptable. 4. Stay drug and alcohol free! You ll think more clearly and have more control over your body and decisions. 5. Stay accountable to people you care about.
Risky Situation #1 1: Let s go to your house. Isn t your mom still at work? 2: Yeah, but she told me not to have anyone over. 1: So what! Do you do everything she says? You re not a baby! You can do whatever you want! 2: You re right I m not a baby. I m saying NO and I don t need to give you a list of reasons why. 1: Ok, I guess you re right.
Risky Situation #2 1: I don t feel right about being at this party. Everyone here is so drunk. 2: It s ok, just relax. I ll get us a drink. 1: No thanks. It looks like a lot of people are in rooms together and we just don t know each other that well. 2: Come on, we can get to know each other. 1: I don t want to be here, let s go see a movie instead. 2: Ok, my parents would kill me if they knew I was here anyway.
Risky Situation #3 1: No, we need to stop. 2: What s wrong? 1: I m just not ready. 2: What do you mean? 1: I m not ready for sex, there are just too many risks. 2: But I don t have any STIs. 1: That s not the only risk. There s pregnancy and all the emotional stuff! 2: But that just means you don t care about me. 1: Why do you think I spend so much time with you? I love all the things we do together! 2: I guess you re right. 1: I want to be close, I just don t want to have sex. Thanks for hearing me out on this.
