Memorable Moments: A Frozen Scene
A snapshot frozen in time, a photograph capturing a significant moment in your life. Whether surrounded by loved ones or standing alone, this image holds the essence of a special memory. It represents a chapter etched in time, a single frame telling a story beyond words. The expressions, the setting, the emotions all crystallized in a single click, ready to transport you back to that precise moment whenever revisited.
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Presentation Transcript
Frozen in the Moment Find a photo of you during a significant time or event in your life. This can be a photo with other people. You will create a frozen moment, which is a verbal snapshot of a scene you will observe. Your goal is to write with enough sensory details in order to place your reader in your moment. What was going on during the time the picture was taken? What were your thoughts and feelings? Your mom Your moment should be no less and no more than ent should be no less and no more than 3 3 paragraphs. paragraphs. Memoir should focus on a single moment that seems significant to the author s life. Author should consistently show the significance of the event through engaging sensory details, compelling language, and a balance of action and thoughts. Memoir should be neat and published in an appropriate and attractive format. Memoir could be used as a model for others. Memoir is nearly free of errors.
Revision Ideas: expand examples and details vary sentence structure use strong verbs use vivid adjectives include sensory details include figurative language check organization Editing Ideas: spelling capitalization punctuation run-ons and fragments indenting Check your response! Revise and edit your writing. Add more sensory details to your writing. Also be sure to check spelling and punctuation. *Remember: What did you see? What did you hear? What could you smell? What could you taste? How did you feel? Be extremely descriptive!
Add more sensory details: What do you see? What do you feel? What do you hear? What do you smell? What do you taste? Include action and use some strongvividverbs. Replace tired, worn-out, dead words with better synonyms. Show why the moment is significant.
Frozen in the Moment Example The sky was silver satin, clouds bunching one on top of the other, their underbellies dark and heavy with rain. Crowded into the gondola, we rode to the top of the mountain, my small cousins clustered around me, pushed up next to the windows, peering down at the dusky green trees below. As we traveled closer to the sheer granite face, their eyes lit with sparkling excitement upon seeing the carving of the soldiers. They giggled and gasped as we listened to the guide share some interesting facts: Jefferson Davis s thumb is the size of a sofa; General Lee is as tall as a nine-story building; two school buses can fit on the back of the horse.
Suddenly, we felt the gondola lurch and sway as wind buffeted against the sides, whistling in around the window frames, cool and moist, promising rain. We hoped that the storm would hold back long enough for us to reach the top of the mountain, explore the stony summit, and walk close to the precipitous edges. I glanced over at my cousin who is the mother of the little girls. I remember when she had been young and had accompanied me on her first visit to the mountain. Now, thirty-three years later, time was repeating itself, a family tradition. I first went to Stone Mountain with you, and now my daughters are visiting with Cousin Emily, she smiled, and I was touched by the sentiment one generation to the next.
Another bump and a grinding sound of cables on metal signaled that the gondola had reached its destination. The doors slid open, and we pushed through them, into the visitor center, carried along with the crowd like fish slipping through warm, murky water. The humid Georgia air closed in, making us feel like wilting plant stalks left in an overgrown garden. We trooped toward the outside doors, holding little hands to keep the girls safe and tethered. When we stepped out onto the top of the mountain, the clouds parted and allowed shimmering wisps of sunlight to fall and dapple across the rocky surface. The girls froze in delight, and we savored the moment standing together, touching the sky.
Criteria 4 3 2 1 Memoir focuses on a single moment that seems significant to the author s life. Memoir focuses on a single moment that seems kind of significant to the author s life. Author sometimes shows the significance of the events through sensory details, compelling language, and a balance of action and thoughts. Memoir focuses on a single moment that does not seem significant to the author s life. Author tells the significance of the events through direct statements instead of sensory details. Author does not seem to be aware of the significance of the moment. Memorable Moment Author consistently shows the significance of the event through engaging sensory details, compelling language, and a balance of action and thoughts. No effort is made to reveal the significance of the events to the reader. Style & Technique Memoir is nearly error-free. Memoir contains minimal mistakes that do not interfere with meaning. Numerous minor errors often make memoir difficult to read. Many errors in spelling, capitalization, and punctuation often interfere with meaning. Conventions
Frozen in the Moment Final Frozen in the Moment Response: Type or write neatly in blue or black ink Double space typing 12-point font Due next Tuesday, August 24 4 Memoir focuses on a single moment that seems significant to the author s life. Author consistently shows the significance of the event through engaging sensory details, compelling language, and a balance of action and thoughts. Memoir is nearly error-free.
